IN DANNYS MIND
“Heaven is in my mind. I put it together; construct it like the hells in which I’ve lived out of wishes, prayers, ideas, out of voice, motion, tears…” *
"what? Berry. ...guurl...what is the matter witchyo son? Why e pacin back and forth like dat? Mumblin somethin bout Heaven. What e know bout heaven crazy as he is?"
"I'm not crazy Miss Pam. I am autistic. If you were intelligent enough to understand that then maybe you wouldn't be so rude"
Berry had a hard time keeping her laughter in check. Then she thot "What the hell...fuck this bitch" and let loose her hearty laughter until tears ran down her face. Pam didnt need to know that this was a way to let the real tears flow; the ones that Berry kept hidden deep down inside; the ones that came out big and fat because they were swollen with hurt, worry, and grief. She slowed her laughter to just short of hysteria and leaned on her work table wiping her face.
"Wooo Pam...I guess my crazy son told you... now didnt he?"
"I heard he was in special ed and he has to have an aide with him to keep him in all his classes and anyway he shouldn't be talking to his elders like dat"
"You were being mean and nasty Pam. Treating him just like the kids in school do. You grown. You should know better. All Danny did was tell you the bald face truth and you know it. He checked you and he checked you good. Now gimme my money and get outta my house you disrespectful bitch"
Showdown...
After the 35 second staredown Pam lowered her eyes, cleared her throat and reached for the embellished jeans that took Berry a full week to do.
"Um...I have half and i was gonna get the rest to you on payday this Friday. Izzat okay?"
"Sure" Berry said as she snatched the jeans back. "Just let me get my sharp shears here" Pam watched in horror as Berry placed the point of her scissors in the middle of the waist band as if to slice the jeans right down the middle
.
"Gurl stop! Is you cr...uh...what is you doin' ?"
.
"You have half the money, so I'm going to give you your moneys worth...or is there some other decision you want to make?"
A shorter staredown this time. Pam made an abrupt about face, stalked to the door and said without turning around "I'll be back on Friday" and slammed it on her way out.
Danny walked back into the room talking, chuckling and laughing to him self. Berry knew that was his way of dealing with a situation he couldnt grasp.
"Was I wrong? Was that my fault? Is she mad at me?" pacing pacing across and back back and across laughing laughing Danny stops to finger her eyelashes, something he's done from the time he was able to reach out and touch. At 17 years old he was still showing his beloved mother this unique expression of affection. Danny stopped for a minute to look in her eyes. Berry looks back in his and wonders for the zillionth time "was there something i did or didnt do? He doesnt deserve to be this way."
"No sweetie, Miss Pam is just what I said, mean and nasty and you did just like I tought you. You said the words exactly right."
Danny said "I can't think of quick comebacks."
"I know Danny-O. You did perfect. When anyone calls you crazy or retard you set them straight and let them know about them selves."
"O... OK ..Mom?" Berry waited until the words straightned themselves out in his brain so he could say the right ones. It took her years to understand what Danny was trying to say when he wanted to tell her that he didnt like ice in his cold drinks. He asked her what do you call a drink with out ice in it? "um... room temperature?" So Danny with all faith in his mom, constantly ordered his drinks at room temp. Until he learned enough on his own to say that he didnt like ice because it watered down his drinks, not because it made them cold.
"Mom? is.. is Heaven like hell?"
"Awwwman" Berry thought "he's getting ready to ask me something deep and philosophical again"
"No Danny, hell is the total opposite of Heaven. Why do you ask?"
"Because when you listen to that one poetry album with those... those... French women ...this girl ... this girl goes 'Heaven is in my mind. I put it together; construct it like the hells in which I’ve lived out of wishes, prayers, ideas, out of voice, motion, tears'* what's she saying that for?"
Berry was always astounded by his idetic memory. She just bought that cd yesterday! He could remember practically everything he read and heard and he could perfectly mimic any sound he heard. He just did both voices, the part where the woman calls and the man answers in the poem, in perfect time...he didnt even notice. "Danny do you know how brilliant you are?"
"yeah"
"okay Danny-O it sounds to me like the only way she can think of heaven is thru the trials she has gone thru in her life. I think she is telling those that opress that they cannot make her as they want her to be. her world will be shaped for the better by learning from whatever they have put her through. Do you understand what i am saying?"
"Yeah, the government wants to keep her poor, her man wants to keep her down, her mom and dad want her to take a job where she will be secure and she's telling them she might not wanna do it their way and Miss Pam can't try to cheat you out of the money she owes you. You did Solomon on her." laugh laugh "thats from the Bible." turn pace laugh laugh laugh "Solomon she did solomon... on ... she did solomon..." push against the wall pace pace pace push again push again push again exit, stage right.
Heaven is in my mind. I put it together; construct it like the hells in which I’ve lived out of wishes, prayers, ideas, out of voice, motion, tears' *
Berry shakes her head as her son turns her favorite poetry into a rap song and he walks back to his room. "He's going to be alright" she tells her cat Tiffany. Meoooower!
* poetry by Les Nubians
"what? Berry. ...guurl...what is the matter witchyo son? Why e pacin back and forth like dat? Mumblin somethin bout Heaven. What e know bout heaven crazy as he is?"
"I'm not crazy Miss Pam. I am autistic. If you were intelligent enough to understand that then maybe you wouldn't be so rude"
Berry had a hard time keeping her laughter in check. Then she thot "What the hell...fuck this bitch" and let loose her hearty laughter until tears ran down her face. Pam didnt need to know that this was a way to let the real tears flow; the ones that Berry kept hidden deep down inside; the ones that came out big and fat because they were swollen with hurt, worry, and grief. She slowed her laughter to just short of hysteria and leaned on her work table wiping her face.
"Wooo Pam...I guess my crazy son told you... now didnt he?"
"I heard he was in special ed and he has to have an aide with him to keep him in all his classes and anyway he shouldn't be talking to his elders like dat"
"You were being mean and nasty Pam. Treating him just like the kids in school do. You grown. You should know better. All Danny did was tell you the bald face truth and you know it. He checked you and he checked you good. Now gimme my money and get outta my house you disrespectful bitch"
Showdown...
After the 35 second staredown Pam lowered her eyes, cleared her throat and reached for the embellished jeans that took Berry a full week to do.
"Um...I have half and i was gonna get the rest to you on payday this Friday. Izzat okay?"
"Sure" Berry said as she snatched the jeans back. "Just let me get my sharp shears here" Pam watched in horror as Berry placed the point of her scissors in the middle of the waist band as if to slice the jeans right down the middle
.
"Gurl stop! Is you cr...uh...what is you doin' ?"
.
"You have half the money, so I'm going to give you your moneys worth...or is there some other decision you want to make?"
A shorter staredown this time. Pam made an abrupt about face, stalked to the door and said without turning around "I'll be back on Friday" and slammed it on her way out.
Danny walked back into the room talking, chuckling and laughing to him self. Berry knew that was his way of dealing with a situation he couldnt grasp.
"Was I wrong? Was that my fault? Is she mad at me?" pacing pacing across and back back and across laughing laughing Danny stops to finger her eyelashes, something he's done from the time he was able to reach out and touch. At 17 years old he was still showing his beloved mother this unique expression of affection. Danny stopped for a minute to look in her eyes. Berry looks back in his and wonders for the zillionth time "was there something i did or didnt do? He doesnt deserve to be this way."
"No sweetie, Miss Pam is just what I said, mean and nasty and you did just like I tought you. You said the words exactly right."
Danny said "I can't think of quick comebacks."
"I know Danny-O. You did perfect. When anyone calls you crazy or retard you set them straight and let them know about them selves."
"O... OK ..Mom?" Berry waited until the words straightned themselves out in his brain so he could say the right ones. It took her years to understand what Danny was trying to say when he wanted to tell her that he didnt like ice in his cold drinks. He asked her what do you call a drink with out ice in it? "um... room temperature?" So Danny with all faith in his mom, constantly ordered his drinks at room temp. Until he learned enough on his own to say that he didnt like ice because it watered down his drinks, not because it made them cold.
"Mom? is.. is Heaven like hell?"
"Awwwman" Berry thought "he's getting ready to ask me something deep and philosophical again"
"No Danny, hell is the total opposite of Heaven. Why do you ask?"
"Because when you listen to that one poetry album with those... those... French women ...this girl ... this girl goes 'Heaven is in my mind. I put it together; construct it like the hells in which I’ve lived out of wishes, prayers, ideas, out of voice, motion, tears'* what's she saying that for?"
Berry was always astounded by his idetic memory. She just bought that cd yesterday! He could remember practically everything he read and heard and he could perfectly mimic any sound he heard. He just did both voices, the part where the woman calls and the man answers in the poem, in perfect time...he didnt even notice. "Danny do you know how brilliant you are?"
"yeah"
"okay Danny-O it sounds to me like the only way she can think of heaven is thru the trials she has gone thru in her life. I think she is telling those that opress that they cannot make her as they want her to be. her world will be shaped for the better by learning from whatever they have put her through. Do you understand what i am saying?"
"Yeah, the government wants to keep her poor, her man wants to keep her down, her mom and dad want her to take a job where she will be secure and she's telling them she might not wanna do it their way and Miss Pam can't try to cheat you out of the money she owes you. You did Solomon on her." laugh laugh "thats from the Bible." turn pace laugh laugh laugh "Solomon she did solomon... on ... she did solomon..." push against the wall pace pace pace push again push again push again exit, stage right.
Heaven is in my mind. I put it together; construct it like the hells in which I’ve lived out of wishes, prayers, ideas, out of voice, motion, tears' *
Berry shakes her head as her son turns her favorite poetry into a rap song and he walks back to his room. "He's going to be alright" she tells her cat Tiffany. Meoooower!
* poetry by Les Nubians
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